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I was at my parent’s house in Tampa yesterday, visiting the folks for mother’s day. Sometime during the morning, Mom asked me to get the newspaper. “Isn’t that the dog’s job?” I asked, wondering whether I could continue my quest of doing nothing of significance for a day (other than taking her out for dinner and buying her some books).

She gave me a look only a mother could, telling me without words, but in no uncertain terms, “I gave birth to you so you could get me my newspaper.” Gotcha. Also, Dixie the dog was still sleeping.

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A few weeks ago I was riding with a friend in his car, a 2000 Lexus something or other. It’s a nice car, very quiet; not much noise makes it to the cabin from the road. At one point in the ride we’re chatting, talking normally, when all of a sudden he gets a phone call.

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A thought occurred to me yesterday which I was rather surprised at having thought, since it came to me so seemingly randomly, having the qualities of the sudden recollection of a fleeting dream, coming with such force and clarity so as to make me question from whence it came.

The press — newspapers, reporters, investigators, and yes, even blogs (well, some of them) — is, collectively, like the “Maintenance Required” light on your car.

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Just wanted to wish everyone a very happy Pi Day! What’s Pi day, you ask? Why, it’s the most mathematical of all days, that’s what it is. Today is the day when we celebrate the mathematical constant (and irrational real number) Ï€ (3.14) which is the ratio of a circle’s circumference to its diameter (in Euclidean geometry, if you care about such things). Of course, you already know that. I was just saying it in case you got a temporary case of amnesia and forgot this major lesson from geometry class.

And what’s even better, at 3 PM it’ll be even MORE Pi day, since Pi isn’t just 3.14, it’s 3.1415. (Actually, Pi is approximately 3.141592653589793… but celebrating it this accurately would be just plain silly.)

So take out your protractors and pencils, boys and girls, stretch your arms and spin on a field, and take some time today to appreciate your car tire (hopefully without the protractor in hand) because today is the day for Ï€. At least in America. The Europeans celebrate it on July 22 (22/7) and the Chinese are way out there, celebrating it on December 21 at 1:13, since the Chinese approximation of Pi is 355/113. But who cares, right? We’re Americans, and just like we don’t care that Canada celebrates Thanksgiving early, so too do we not care that the rest of the world uses different approximations.

By the way March 14th is also Einstein’s birthday, so go out and have some round cake pie.

In a Fark thread about a teacher hitting a viola student, Thuper Ranger described rather accurately what the audition process for most orchestras is when you’re a violist.

Thuper Ranger: May I be in your orchestra?

Conductor: Well, we have a long application procedure with 3 rehearsal trials. It usually takes about 2 weeks. What do you play?

Thuper Ranger: The viola.

Conductor: We meet every Tuesday. Here’s your music. Welcome to the team.

Having played the viola for a few years, I can confidently say he hit the nail on the head. In fact, violists are often so rare that bad violinists will be forced to play the instrument in order to fill the ranks, as a punishment by conductors. Also, bad violinists tend to run away to the viola section in order to escape being made obsolete.

I know I haven’t asked this before, but if there are any violists reading this I’d like to hear from you. How did you get started on the viola? What are some interesting observations you’ve made? Also, if you have any corny musical jokes (let’s face it: they all are), go ahead and share them here.