After leaving Puerto Rico, for a very long time I avoided anything Catholic. First, because mass was always boring. Sit down, stand up, sit down, kneel, sit down, stand up, kneel, stand up, sit down, Amen. There was no heart, no spirit to it! Just rites and rituals, all completely devoid of their spiritual significance after hundreds of years of repetition, rituals which have made God an unapproachable, silent being. Later, that morphed into it seeming to me an archaic institution whose only hope for survival was to continue a grip on people attained during the power vacuum left by the fall of Rome. I guess I bought into all the angst, first the Protestant, then the Atheist.

Lately I’ve started to once again discover the Church, but not as most may imagine. I came to the realization that the spiritual significance of the Mass is defined not by the rituals themselves, but what the persons participating in the sacraments–whether audience or active participant–put into it. I don’t see the Church now as a source of salvation, a matter of dogma, or even as a my personal faith. Rather, I’ve discovered the aesthetic qualities of its mysticism, the beauty and peace found in rituals and ceremonies, its colorful history, and the structure put in place over the span of almost 2,000 years. Suddenly, Mass transforms from something boring to something lively, full, and mystical, a source of art which serves as not only a source of comfort, but also a place–both physical and spiritual–of wonder, where I feel comfortable allowing to myself not have to know, where I can find spiritual shelter.

I find a fair amount of this aesthetic at the local church, but thanks to the Web I can also find it online via videos and podcasts. For video, really, there’s nothing better than EWTN, which you may recognize as the Catholic cable chanel. Here people can get a taste of the Catholic world view. But since I’m usually not in front of a screen (at least not one I can watch videos), I look for podcasts. There are two podcasts I recommend very highly for anyone interested in finding out more about the Church. The first is Catholic Under the Hood, which goes over Catholic history and theology from a Franciscan perspective and is done by Friar Seraphim Beshoner. The second is The Saintcast, done by Dr. Paul Camarata (a neurosurgeon), which covers the lives of the saints, both famous and obscure. This one I’ve been listening to for quite a while, and has become a mainstay in my podcast listening schedule. I’m looking around for more.

I’m not a Catholic, per se, at least not if it means accepting all of the Church’s beliefs. (For example, while I hate the idea of abortion, I am for its legalization; I also think birth control’s a good idea in practice, if not in theory; I’m not against embryonic stem cell research; and I believe in rebirth.) If anything I’m much closer to a Unitarian. Still, it doesn’t change the fact that I’m awed by the pure beauty found in Catholicism, its art, its history, and its meaning. During times where I’m forced to stare into an eternal darkness it gives me hope, and as far as I’m concerned, hope–true or false–is still better than no hope.

As a side note, if you’re interested in a multi-faceted view of theology, check out John Hummel’s Blog The Religions blog and podcast. I had the pleasure of meeting John (Twitter folks, check out @blogthereligions and/or @johnhummel) at a recent Tampa Tweetup.  Although I wrote this before listening to his Podcast #4 (on Catholicism), I recommend you go ahead and take a listen. Interesting stuff for the theologians among us, and definitely on topic. 

By the way, if you really, really want to know what I consider a must to read, and you use Google Reader, go ahead and add me to your “Shared” list: gnorbx@gmail.com. And yes, it’s always reciprocal. If you don’t use Google Reader, then check out my Shared Items. I warn you, though, I tend to go on thematic blitzes, so if everything there looks like it’s about transhumanism or self improvement or writing or philosophy, try going back a few pages.

Anyway, here’s the new Le Linkage list of sites you should visit:

Novelr Needs Your Help: So Eli over at Novelr has finally hit the big time and started receiving a fair share of pageviews. The problem with this, as anyone who’s ever run a site knows, is bandwidth. He needs more now, and doesn’t have the money to cover it, so he’s sort of asking for donations. Now, if you’ve been reading this blog for a while you know that I don’t often ask for money. In fact, the only time I’ve ever even mentioned donations is when I added that “Donations” area at the bottom of my home page, with links to the Methuselah Foundation and the Digestive Distress and Dysmotilities Association. (As you can guess, the donations aren’t for me. I’m in the very, very fortunate position of being able to offer Gnorb.NET for free, since Google Ads pay enough to cover the bandwidth.) But I’m asking you, if you have a few dollars to spare, to help a blogger out.

Edit: From Eli (in the comments section below): “The crisis is over, Gnorb. A few really good readers pooled together their resources and the Novelr’s above the water again.” In other words the M Foundation and the DDDA can still use the help.

Root & Sprout^TM: This one’s for the parents out there. Oft mentioned blogger Melissa G is starting a new monthly publication! Root & Sprout is an online magazine “for practical information, stories, and advice about being a parent and raising kids.” Now, I know every parent reading this is already awesome, but check Root & Sprout out to see what you can learn from other just-as-awesome parents. And tell ‘em Gnorb sent you.

Writing Tools for Mac: If you’re a writer and you have a Mac, you’ll want to check this list of writing applications out. There’s a video there, too, by the way. I don’t know how you can help someone out with this, but I’ll include it anyway.

Edit: As per reader request, I’ll help a brother (with a Mac) out by making a shortlist: SubEthaEdit, Google Docs*, Microsoft Word*, BBEdit, Scrivener*, TextExpander, WriteRoom*, Ulysses, StoryMill, CopyWrite… You can see some descriptions at Literature and Late.

WSF report: 90 Is the New 50: Ever dream of climbing Mt. Everest at the ripe young age of 125? More and more biologists are jumping on the engineer negligible senecense bandwagon. Maybe it’s time you do as well. Options to extend life are, at the moment, limited to lifestyle choices — diet, exercise, and leading a purpose driven life — which may increase your life from ~75 years to ~90 years. Not much, but enough to give you a chance at receiving the treatments. Help yourself and future generations out by calling your senator or state representative. “Without funding, this longevity science which is truly on the verge of a breakthrough will be marooned.” (After you read that, however, I also highly recommend Is Aging Itself a Disease? by the Vorlon-loving Anne.)

2008 Consumer Action Handbook: If you’re in the US, ever heard of the Federal Citizen Information Center? Probably not. Too bad, because it’s their job to distribute free and low-cost (less than a gallon of gas) Federal consumer publications. Find out how to get out of bounced checks and overdraft fees, improve your credit, reduce junk mail and telemarketing calls, get a paid apprenticeship, and much more. Before you help a brother out, why not make sure you’re in a position to help?

Using Mini-Retirements to Get More Out of Life: While on the subject of finance, let’s talk about retirement. If you work, you’re likely looking forward to the day when you can finally call it quits and actually get on to living your life. But what about taking mini retirements? The truly wealthy do it all the time. Can you set yourself up to doing it? The article linked goes to an interview with Timothy Ferriss, author of The 4-Hour Workweek: Escape 9-5, Live Anywhere, and Join the New Rich .

10 Books that Prove Science Fiction Just Got Harder: For the past few years, the market for hard sci-fi (science fiction that isn’t afraid to explain what’s going on) has been getting smaller and smaller. However, it looks like the genre’s about to be revolutionized by a group of very awesome books that recently came out. When I saw this I realized my reading list had just gotten larger.

Neil Gaiman Writing for Dr. Who? In short, no. Gaiman’s name has been thrown about after Steven Moffat took over the show and made the following carefully worded statement: “Well, Neil and Steven Moffat had dinner, and Neil hasn’t said no, but there’s many slip between cup and lip…” Remember the game telephone? Where you pass on a message to someone and they pass it on, and eventually the last person gets a message that’s totally different from the first? Well, the internet rumor mill is a lot like that, and the “hasn’t said no” turned into “OMG NEIL IS WRITING DOCTOR WHO BEST NEWS EVER.” He’s not. Yet.

Alright, so that about does it for this edition. Want to read more? The head on to Sentient Developments for George Dvorsky’s “What I’ve been reading” list. And like I mentioned before, you can check out more of what I’ve been reading by checking out my Google Reader Shared Items. And, if you don’t feel like reading, but instead want to watch a couple of informative, yet entertaining movies, Mark Cuban has a couple of recommendations.

For a while now, I’ve been buying shows on DVD. Why? Because I don’t want to have to endure one second of a show I can’t stand. It’s been that way for years, which is why I simply don’t watch much television anymore. Add to that the fact that I hate having to watch TV on a schedule and you see my problem: even if there’s a show I like, I’m pretty likely to miss it.

DVDs solve that.

Thing is, finding a DVD in the box, then putting it in, and selecting the episode… well, that’s just too much work. That’s I want an AppleTV.

Right now, when The Wife and I decide to watch television, it goes something like this:

“So hon, what do you want to watch?” I say.

“Whatever’s on.” She says.

“Alright, let’s just flip through the channels.” I Pick up the controller and start channel surfing. “Nope.” Next. “Nope.” Next. “Nada. Nothing. Zilch. Zip. Zero. Na-ah. No way. Negatory. Nein. Rien. Nyet… Yoooou wanna just watch a movie?”

“Sure, which one?”

“Feel like a comedy?” No. “What about romance?” No. “Action?” Maybe. “Sci-fi?” Sure. “Which one?”

“Pick whatever.”

“Alright, then how ’bout this one?” No. “Or this one?” She shakes her head. “This? Any of these? This? This? This? What about this? Feel like… no? This?” Sigh. “You feel like renting something?”

Times like these are why want my television to act like my RSS reader. Seriously, I just want to be able to download all my favorite shows directly, so I never have to turn the channel. (Sort of like if you have a good RSS reader you rarely have to leave it to view a site.) I’d have my own one-person, love-everything-all-the-time network! Imagine how awesome it would be!

“Hey, Hon,” I’d say, “whatcha feel like watch’n?”

“Whatever you want,” she’d answer.

“SWEET! Let’s just put it on random. I don’t really want to have to think about it, and because I like all these shows, anything’s fine.” I’d put it on random, and a show would come up. “Hey, I love this show! Buuut I hate this episode.” Next. “No, not that, either.” Next. “Not that. No, not that. Not that. Not.. Maybe, but let’s see what’s next. Not that. Why do I even have that? Not that. Not that. I forgot about that, but not now. Not that. Not that. How about.. Not that… Yeah, let’s go back to that other one. No not that one, the other… no, not.. Not that one. Not that one… The one before. The one before. No. No. No–THAT ONE! STOP! RIGHT THERE! No, the one before. The one before…”

So basically it’d be like having cable without all the crappy, useless networks. And it would be awesome.

As a child…
It was night. My best friend, Fabitin, and my cousin, Jesus, were engaged in a basketball that I found absolutely no interest in. While I wanted to play with them, I didn’t particularly care to take part in the game. As a 6 year old I was short, fat, and frankly much more interested in my little red T-Bird convertible than losing again to either — or worse, both! — of them. Of course, this time the court was my front driveway, which didn’t matter at all except for the slight, 5-degree incline between where I sat and the road.

The game had no timer, not set score at which victory would be declared, and no real rules other than the usual “no hitting, biting, or using weaponry”. Heck, there really wasn’t even a boundary, other than maybe the grass and the road. Realizing this, I decided to give the game an end point (after which I would most certainly gain two new playmates) and announced “OK, when the car rolls on to the basketball court the game ends. OK?” I presumed their lack of acknowledgment meant that they understood, and felt no need to waste time responding.

A few minutes later, having grown weary of watching them play (and of being alone), I triumphantly rolled the little red car down the driveway, did my imitation of that obnoxious buzzer at the end of basketball games, and watched as they both paid just enough attention to the car so as to not step on it. They just kept playing.

This was about the time when I decided that maybe they didn’t want to play with me, so I took my little red car, now parked safely on that little dip between the driveway and the road, and went inside to… well, I don’t remember what, I just remember going inside. (I was 6, remember? I wasn’t exactly remembering much those days.)

As an adult…
A few years ago, I was responsible for creating contests in order to increase readership at a few websites and a magazine. Unlike in the basketball court, the response was surprisingly… meager. Not only was the announcement not acknowledged, the contests were pretty much ignored. In fact, winners were usually that by default.

When I was given the position of Community Leader for the Commentary community over at 9Rules I decided to come up with a way to stimulate readership (and commentary) throughout the community by introducing a contest (The CCCC) where I could grant the best note over the course of a week in the commentary community three, then six points. (At that time six points could be considered a bonanza.) Having failed miserably so many times before, I was confident that I could come up with something now. I mean, you can only fail so many times before you succeed, right?

I spent a week studying similar contests with similar communities and eventually came up with a set of rules and regulations, none of which involved a plastic T-Bird rolling down my driveway. This one not only failed, it failed spectacularly: not one person entered.

You know, after writing this I sort of feel like the King of the Swamp in Monty Python’s Search for the Holy Grail, who related his history so: “When I first came here, this was all swamp. Everyone said I was daft to build a castle on a swamp, but I built in all the same, just to show them. It sank into the swamp. So I built a second one. That sank into the swamp. So I built a third. That burned down, fell over, then sank into the swamp. But the fourth one stayed up. And that’s what you’re going to get, Lad, the strongest castle in all of England.” Of course, none of my contests have yet stayed up, but I’m sure that’ll change. Eventually. If I just keep at it. Right?

If I can’t run one…
Anyway, so what’s the point in all this? Well, about a week ago, fellow 9Ruler Ben Gillbanks put up a contest on one of his blogs, Binary Moon, the Binary Moon Links Competition. The contest is simple: write a post about a Binary Moon post, then link it there. — which is exactly what you’re reading right now.

Now, Ben also runs a number of other sites, the most interesting of which for the sake of this post is Binary Joy. While the Ben’s contest has nothing directly to do with that site, indirectly it does.

Think about it: the guy runs a site where he writes news and reviews about games. He comes up with the contest which is not only incredibly simple, it’s also chock-full of rewards, for both him and the winners. (And if you don’t understand the reasoning behind that last statement, don’t worry about it.) What’s more, the contest is VERY well responded to. Why? Is it because he’s offering great prizes? Well, yeah, actually. But also because it’s incredibly, sickeningly simple: Write a post. Link it here. Tell me about it. You’re entered. Not many rules and regulations to follow, clauses and stipulations, legal mumbo-jumbo — nada. Just a contest. That’s it.

Why can’t I come up with any cool contests like that? Who knows, maybe next time I will. (And if you read my last post, I hope you saw what I did there.) For now, if I can’t run one, I might as well enter one.

[Edit: Didn't win, but was as a finalist! Thank you, Ben!]

Behold, the power of the Internet! Two-hundred thousand years of human evolution and technological revolution, all so we can laugh at a kitten going buck-wild on a laptop.

Business School Podcast for Free: America’s leading business schools — Wharton, Duke’s Fuqua School, Harvard — are all making courses available for download via iTunes. (If you expect me to tell you why this is good, you’re wasting your time. Go check it out now.)

The Perfect Mark: Ever wonder if anyone actually ever falls for those emails we all get promising to make you rich if you help out some Nigerian widow stash US$45-million in your bank account? Wonder no more: the answer is yes, and who they ensnare might surprise you. This New Yorker piece is an actual story about a guy who, in his greed and pride, fell victim to these scammers and ended up in jail for it. [Source: Black Marks on Wood Pulp. Also, reminds me of this previous Gnorb.NET piece on avoiding CraigsList scammers.]

Becoming Human: So, how did we get from where we were 4,000,000 years ago as simple, knuckle-dragging Australopithecines to the current state of Homo Sapiens? This very interesting Flash video shows you where we came from and how we got here.

Washington’s Farewell Address Translated into Modern English: In the course of human history, not many have had quite as strong an impact as General George Washington, the first President of the United States. His farewell address is agreed upon by historians to be one of the finest in all American politics, since it deals with issues we struggle with even unto this day. The problem is that since it is written in 1790’s English, most people today can’t really understand it, which is why xkcd undertook the task of translating the piece into modern English. One his commenters upped the ante, reposting a modern day translation of the American Declaration of Independence.

The Height of Hubris? Ever seen the movie Gattaca? In it, the main protagonist is a lowly, genetically inferior human trying to get to space. In the process, he begins transforming his body, one of the ways being limb-lengthening surgery. In this BetterHumans piece, Simon asks whether his personal desire for such a surgery (available from a reputable source for as low as US$20,000 in China) is hubris, or whether he really is justified in wanting to make himself taller. After all, “The majority of CEOs are over six foot, the taller US presidential candidate tends to win the election, and people earn more money, on average, with each extra inch of height.” Here, he outlines reasons for and against the surgery. A very interesting read, especially for those interested in Transhumanist topics and cosmetic surgery.

The Last Question: So, we’ve seen where humans came from and where we are. Now, where are we going? Sci-Fi legend Isaac Asimov tells a short, trillion-year tale of how this whole human experience might end, and maybe how it began. “The last question was asked for the first time, half in jest, on May 21, 2061, at a time when humanity first stepped into the light. The question came about as a result of a five-dollar bet over highballs, and it happened this way…”

Multi-Touch Monitors: This is seriously cool. In this video, Jeff Han and Phil Davidson demonstrate how a multi-touch driven computer screen will change the way we work and play.

Holy Crap! Is This Real?! And now, for something totally different.

Online Game: Dodge: Simple and Addictive: Does it get any better than that? It’s the kind of game that keeps you as entertained as a stoner watching a side-loaded washing machine. Whoooa…. hey, nachos!

Well, that does it for this week. You can check out the previous episodes in the Le Linkage category of Gnorb.NET.

Probably the most studied war today, World War II still holds us in fascination over the immensity of the odds at stake, the fairy tale like themes of good versus evil, and as an example of the lengths we will go to in order to win at war, or the depths to which humans will sink to in torturing or killing one another. The war saw the rise of a tyrant bent on world domination, the extermination of millions through genocide, and the birth of the nuclear age.

The first ever use of nuclear weaponry in war occurred on August 6, 1949, in the town of Hiroshima, Japan. The following video chronicles a bit of that history, including eye witness accounts from the crew who unleashed Little Boy, and from victims who endured its wrath.

Aside from the complete lack of tentacles, short skirted uniforms showing off white panties, mecha [Edit: D'oh! Forgot, Bender and Tinny Tim.], and the absurdly large breasts, this is still a pretty darn cool drawing. Make Leela into an android and you got yourself a series.

Now, for those of you who haven’t heard, thanks to fan demand, Futurama’s returning in 2008. Frankly, it’d be absolutely hilarious to see an entire episode drawn in this style.

By the way, the artist who did this also did a Simpsons one, and has been hired by a comic book company to make a manga-style Simpsons. Very nice.

• First and foremost, my apologies for not writing any long, insightful articles recently. Right now I’m in the middle of a rather tight deadline at work and business has been picking up (as expected due to the season), so long insightful posts are few and far between. Also, my recent addiction to the TV show Firefily, which I received as a gift from The Wife, hasn’t helped any. (Damn you, Joss Whedon!) In any case, I should be back into the swing of things by next week, Firefly permitting.
• If you’re wondering about whether I’m going to write about my vacation, the answer is “barely”. I’ll be writing about the part of the trip where I spent time in Southern Pines with Third-Child and Peacecraft. Combine the beauty of North Carolina with great friends in the state and the temptation to move there is pretty high. Except for Charlotte, which I would only live in if I had to choose between it, Mogadishu, Bagdad, and Detroit.
• For those of you sickos who, like me, incessantly look at the FeedBurner box, you may have noticed a sudden drop in the RSS counts. It seems that for some reason, the Rojo RSS reader hasn’t been showing up in the FeedBurner stats lately. Yes, there are that many readers using Rojo to read this blog. I love every single one of them. Even if they don’t show up in the stats.
• Remember that little giveaway I was running? Yeah, well it’s over. Due to (a) nobody responding to it, (b) annoying requirements, and (c) nobody responding to it because I totally screwed up the advertising part of it, Junior wins the contest. Why? because he covered for me while I was gone with a few rather good articles. Also, because he actually commented on the article. Finally, because he’ll be writing some more and that’s all I can really afford to pay him. So, congratulations, Junior!
• A few days ago I found out that Gnorb.NET has been listed in the Commentary category of the 9Rules Network. I’m not sure I totally agree with the decision, but I don’t disagree with it, which I guess is what matters. Heck, I’m the one that suggested it. Didn’t think Tyme would take me seriously, though. I thought this would be more of a Personal blog, you know? I even though it might classify as Humor, but after having read other 9Rules sites like Internet Zillionaire I realize I’m fairly… unfunny. Don’t tell that to The Wife, though. Keeping her laughing is one of my favorite things to do, so let’s keep the “Gnorb’s not funny” thing under our collective hats, ok? At any rate, the Personal category is way too full anyway, so Commentary’s just fine. Besides, I’m in good company.
• While we’re on the topic of 9Rules, I’ve been discovering a ton of spectacular blogs recently. Not surprisingly, the Business, Anime, and Writing categories have caught the bulk of my attention. If you’re looking for good reading, for the love of all that is bloggy, check out 9Rules. Also, Firefox users may be interested in the 9Rules Search plug-in available, which adds the 9Rules search to the Firefox search options. I’ve been using it since I discovered it a couple days back and it keeps leading me to amazing sites I would have otherwise ignored.
• Speaking of sites, check out Melissa’s Little Wool Gatherings. Honestly, I can’t believe I’m actually recommending a site like this. It’s a frigg’n CRAFTS site, for bloggy’s sake! Still, Melissa is a very talented writer who obviously loves what she does, and that comes out in her writing very nicely. Heck, she even delves into Gnorbesque topics like finances once in a while. Anyway, go check out her blog. For another blog along those lines — sorta — check out BlogLily, who’s also a member of 9Rules (admitted, like me, during round 5). Again, I’m pretty surprised I’m actually recommending these blogs, considering their content. Along with the pottery shopping I did recently (and you’ll hear more about that soon), it seems my world is opening up to the more pansy things of life.

  By the way, Melissa: talk more about finances, yoga, and granola recipes. You’re great at that. Also, next time 9Rules has a submissions round, enter your site. I think — and I’m talking pretty speculatively here — you stand a fair chance at making it, even if you do use Blogger. (Ever thought of upgrading to Wordpress? It’s much better, really.)

Alright, that about does it for the updates. Any questions or suggestions? Put ‘em in the comments section.

Expires on January 31, 2007. Otherwise, have at it. If you haven’t had Cold Stone ice cream, do yourself a favor and try it out, then use this to pick up some for someone special. You can print it out without any of the extra Gnorb.NET stuff here

Download Online Streaming Videos:As you can probably tell, I love watching videos on YouTube. Yes, I’ll admit, I tend to watch more bits of copyrighted material (like The Colbert Report and South Park) than I do stupid people tricks (with the exception of the Angry German Kid and the Numa Numa guy). Once in a while, however, I run into videos I’d like to keep, videos I can’t really purchase, like Chihiro Onitsuka’s Little Beat Rifle music video. KeepVid exists for times like that, by allowing users to download the FLV (Flash Video) file and play it like any other video. You’ll need to download an FLV player to view the videos, but you can find those just about anywhere (including KeepVid.com) for Windows, Mac, or Linux. For you Firefox users, however, there are also extensions that will allow you to download all sorts of media content.

Comic Book Loving Political Junkies Rejoice! The Slate Online has published a comic book version of the entire 9/11 Report. Unlike just about every other comic out there, this one features real world situations, with very real heroes and villains. And unlike the ABC docudrama on the matter, this one actually sticks to the facts. Very well worth reading, especially if you want to read the 9/11 Report, but don’t care to slush through a thousand pages of government documents. More government documents should come in the form of comic books. Think about it, how much easier would doing taxes be if your forms featured Batman, simplifying the efforts The Confuser and TheObfuscator while keeping Mr. FreezeYourAssets at bay?

Super Hero Thanksgiving: Speaking of comics, ever wonder what your favorite super heroes were thankful for during Thanksgiving? Probably not. Someone out there did, however. If you need a cheap laugh, this will probably do.

Quantum Mechanics Made Relatively Simple: In this series of audio and video lectures, theoretical physicist Hans Bethe explains quantum theory and makes it simple enough for just about anyone to understand. These lectures were originally intended for the residents of his neighbors at the Kendal of Ithaca retirement community, but now you too can learn about the physics of the very small, even if you don’t have a full grasp of higher level mathematics.

China and Copyright law: Ever wonder why the Chinese seem to take such a flippant attitude towards copyrights? Here’s a hint: a large part of it is cultural. AsiaBizBlog is a great resource for anyone planning to do business in China, and this particular podcast covers the issue of copyright in a way we in the west can easily understand. (Not that it’s a hard issue, but rather because it is very nuanced.)

5000 Years of Middle Eastern History in 90 Seconds: No wonder these people are always fighting! This flash video goes through 5000 years of history, from the Sumerians to the current day political situation in the middle east. Very interesting video.

Language Roots of Indo-European Languages: Most of us know that English came from a combination of Germanic and French dialects, and that Romantic languages all came from Latin, but did you know that Latin was a subset of something called Latino-Faliscan, and that this language had the same roots as Celtic and Indo-Iranian? This language map shows all of that and more. Very interesting for those into language philosophy and linguistics.

Imagine Earth without People: There’s a saying that goes something like this: Get rid of all ants and parasites in the world and in 50 years everything dies. Get rid of all humans in the world and in 50 years everything flourishes. The sad part is that, for the most part, that’s true. But what if suddenly, tomorrow, every human on Earth disappeared (as in “off the planet” not as in “dead”)? What would the planet look like? What would happen to the bridges and buildings? How long would things last? Very interesting reading for anyone who likes to think about alternate realities.

Lots of Classic Games in FLASH! Space Invaders, Asteroids, Pacman, Snake, Frogger, Simon and other classic games, all in flash. Like the classics? Get ‘em here.

PlanetQuest: Help Discover New Planets: How thrilling would it be to discover a new planet? More than 100 planets having been discovered outside our Solar system. Why not get in on the fun? Using distributed computing — like what the SETI@Home project uses — PlanetQuest hopes to help discover even more planets, some of which may even hold life and be habitable for humans. The project isn’t done, so no software can be downloaded yet. Still, how cool would it be to someday have your descendants travel to a planet you helped discover?

Google Reader: These days, it seems as if you can’t go more than ten steps without reading about what Google is doing. The problem is that, other than search, most of their efforts have met with little fanfare. That may not be the case for long, if Google Reader is any indication. If you’re looking for an RSS reader, especially if you’re looking to replace your current account, check out Google’s newest tool. Robert Scoble did, and it looks like he liked it. After seeing it in action for myself, I may jump the Bloglines ship and do the same. (I’d like to thank Roy for sending this tip.)

Fark Search Engine: While Fark started out being nothing more than a site featuring a picture of a squirrel with giant testicles, it has quickly become one of the Internet’s most interesting “news” sites. Unfortunately, using their search functionality sucks. That’s why someone has come up with the idea of creating a Fark-specific search engine. Now, you don’t have to search the archives or tackle the thoroughness of Google to find that funny headline you saw three or four months back.

What a whopper! This towering 8,000-calorie beefburger’s certainly not for the faint-hearted.

It has four slabs of beef weighing 2lbs, three cheese layers, four bacon rashers, lettuce and tomato.

The Heart Attack Grill in Tempe, Arizona, has wheelchairs to cart off belly-busted customers who tackle the Quadruple Bypass Burger.

Also on the menu is the slightly smaller Triple Bypass Burger and Flatliner Fries cooked in pure lard.

And for extra credit… (sic)

Alas, it seems not everyone got the message. UNICEF was been left out in the cold about blogs. The first half of the decade went by, and the benevolent UN pet project seemed content to just sit this meme out. This changed today, however, when I looked in my comments queue and discovered a comment waiting to be moderated. I guess UNICEF is getting into the blogging scene after all, even if it is a few years too late. Still, I don’t think someone over there grasps the entire “blogging” concept. After all, you have to get your own blog to blog in; you don’t blog by just dropping off random comments in other people’s blogs.

Anyway, just to be nice to this set of dorks, I’ll go ahead and repost their message here. It is, after all, well written, and serves as a sort of “public service announcement” from Gnorb.NET (not that I need to have one, but still). So, without further ado, here it is: UNICEF’s blog spam.

Whether tragic events touch your family personally or are brought into your home via newspapers and television, you can help children cope with the anxiety that violence, death, and disasters can cause.

Listening and talking to children about their concerns can reassure them that they will be safe. Start by encouraging them to discuss how they have been affected by what is happening around them. Even young children may have specific questions about tragedies. Children react to stress at their own developmental level.

The Caring for Every Child’s Mental Health Campaign offers these pointers for parents and other caregivers:

• Encourage children to ask questions. Listen to what they say. Provide comfort and assurance that address their specific fears. It’s okay to admit you can’t answer all of their questions.
• Talk on their level. Communicate with your children in a way they can understand. Don’t get too technical or complicated.
• Find out what frightens them. Encourage your children to talk about fears they may have. They may worry that someone will harm them at school or that someone will try to hurt you.
• Focus on the positive. Reinforce the fact that most people are kind and caring. Remind your child of the heroic actions taken by ordinary people to help victims of tragedy.
• Pay attention. Your children’s play and drawings may give you a glimpse into their questions or concerns. Ask them to tell you what is going on in the game or the picture. It’s an opportunity to clarify any misconceptions, answer questions, and give reassurance.
• Develop a plan. Establish a family emergency plan for the future, such as a meeting place where everyone should gather if something unexpected happens in your family or neighborhood. It can help you and your children feel safer.

If you are concerned about your child’s reaction to stress or trauma, call your physician or a community mental health center.

Doesn’t that make you feel all warm and fuzzy?

(By the way, I checked UNICEF and couldn’t find a thing on this campaign on their site. I did find it, however, at SAMHSA’s National Mental Health Infomation Services website. Still, I’ll keep it as a UNICEF thing because (a) that’s what it said on the message posted, and (b) UNICEF’s in France, so it’s funny. See, just saying “France” made you think about smiling, a lot more than “SAMHSA” did, right?)

Instead of putting up an insightful and witty post this time (one without the word “booger” in the title), I’ve instead decided to follow suit with Renagade Zen and post a picture of myself as a South Park character.

Using the South Park Character Generator, you can — and should — do the same. (For anyone interested in posting their South Park character picture who doesn’t have any place to upload it, just email it to me, norb@gnorb.net and I’ll store it on the server for you. Note that images can’t be hotlinked from anywhere else, though. Sorry.)

For the record, there’s no option to choose a fat body, which eliminates the possibility of about 65% of the US population being able to create true-ish self-portrait (that includes me), but allows us to see what we’d look like if we were paper cut-out cartoons and in shape-ish. Also, I know the whole “South Park” thing is somewhat (a decade) old, but I checked with 1997 and no, it didn’t mind if I borrowed its joke for a while.

The meme continues…

Edit: Here’s The Wife:

If you haven’t seen the video, you can catch it over at Weird Al’s MySpace page. (If you haven’t been to a MySpace page, you’ll want to stop the player which automatically starts up. Scroll down a bit on the page, just past the Straight Outta Lynwood picture, and click the Play button on the first video player.) It’s hands down one of his best songs ever, since it’s not just funny, but actually really good. If you liked Amish Paradise you’ll definitely love this, which all by itself pretty much pwns anything in his previous CD, Poodle Hat.

Anyway, go and watch it, then vote for him, capiche?

By the way, if you like the video, and you support artists who arent self righteous and pompass about their celebrity status, grab yourself a copy of the Straight Outta Lynwood CD. After all there aren’t too many artists that will go as far out of their way for their audience as this guy will. Might as well vote with your dollars, right?

Finally, I’ve decided to put this video up for all of you thinking of not buying this CD, instead choosing to go the LimeWire or Gnutella route. Enjoy.

Edit: I didn’t know this before, but MySpace gives you the code to put the video on a Web page (like, say, this one). Here’s the White and Nerdy video. Still, head over to Weird Al’s MySpace site to listen to a few more of his songs. And remember, BUY THIS CD (using this link, please).